Big Brother
The Princess Lands Her Tiara

Episode Report Card
Miss Alli: C | 1 USERS: A+
Ending and Pretending

Danielle once again uses her incredibly irritating "innocent as a dove, sly as a snake" line. Apparently, she has not noticed yet that hammering on the brilliance of her own duplicity is not really getting her a lot of traction with these people. Basically, Danielle's only argument in her defense is that her family was counting on her. Again, this has nothing to do with the way she sat in the DR congratulating herself. She seems to have a real problem with the notion that it is not actually the ruthlessness of her play that is making these people not like her. It's her arrogance. And clearly, that hasn't changed.

Dramatic music fetched from the vaults of the music editor from Starsky and Hutch plays in the background over shots of the evictees, who we are meant to think are pondering their very serious decisions. Of course, what they are really doing is pondering how they currently look on television. Sigh.

Back in the house when the cameras are off, Danielle tells Lisa once again that all she was ever doing was playing the game. She needs a clue. She also says she'd do it all over again, which means she needs two clues. You're going to lose, here, dummy. You might think that would indicate the need for a change in strategy, if you had it to do all over again.

Julie transitions to more PMR jabbering about who is less offensive, basically. Then we see all the houseguests placing their special voting keys in the special finale voting box. I'm not sure when the people who make this show are going to notice that no sequence including a voting or nominating ritual has ever been interesting. Not ever.

Annoyingly enough, we are then taken to an interview back in the Chenterview studio with the evictees. God, ENOUGH already. Julie welcomes them, yakkety yak. Josh acts like a spaz, and Julie tells him to shut up. Well, I am summarizing. When she gets things settled down, she starts the interview with Jason, asking him whether the other houseguests influenced his "Christian virgin" attitudes. He totally misses the question -- or dodges it, depending on whether you think he's dim or not. I tend to think he's a little dim, honestly. At any rate, instead of answering the question, he says some more how much he loves everyone, which is...fine, but not really relevant, of course. It's just the only thing he knows how to say. He's kind of like a blender where all the buttons are broken but one. You're getting "Chop," whether you like it or not.

Julie asks Josh about Merritt. In a truly strange and perhaps Freudian slip, Julie intends to ask "When are you going to make an honest woman of her?," and instead says, "When are you going to make a decent woman of her?" Wow, Julie. Harsh. Josh says they're taking things at their own pace, blah blah blah, and says he's not making any big trips to register for china just now. Translation: "I voted for Lisa, and I'm still hoping she might sleep with me. I can always get married later."

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Big Brother




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