Big Brother

Episode Report Card
M. Giant: C | Grade It Now!
Misty Slop-Colored Memories

We catch up to the reaction of the final three -- Hayden, Lane, and Enzo -- after Lane won part two of the three-part final HoH competition. Hayden won the first part and Lane won the second part, which you might know because you remember, while you know that Enzo lost both parts even if you don't remember. Enzo DRs about how he "don't control nothin' no more," but is still hoping someone will take him to the final two, while Hayden is confident that Lane will take him to the final two if he wins their final showdown. And if Hayden wins he'll probably take himself. Sounds like a solid strategy.

Time for the fancy banquet and champagne toast that always kicks off the annual clip show. They marvel at their own greatness in making it to the final three with their alliance nearly intact. Flashback to Day 2, when Enzo formed the Brigade. I already weecapped it once and I'm not going to do it again. The good news is that I'll be able to finish this weecap in record time.

And then there's a flashback to Day 1, when the lights went out and the original saboteur (and stupid Andrew) struck. Then the final three talk about the other alliance, the "super-couple" Brendon and Rachel, which (as we're reminded by a flashback to Day 3) kicked off when Brendon started talking to Rachel about what a big science geek he was. Then there's a whole montage of Rachel's enraging laugh, which everyone mocks in the Diary Room in turn.

Dinner conversation turns to Hayden's showmance, namely his secret one with Kristen, which of course Andrew spectacularly outed right before he was evicted. Which, after the subsequent HoH competition, led to that big blow-out between Rachel and Kristen. Which, even the second time around is dramatic enough to trigger a commercial break.

Back in the present day, the final three regard the memory wall and its expanse of monochrome. Enzo remarks that the only one missing is the target="_blank">Zingbot, and they imagine his photo in place of the Big Brother logo in the middle (with a little help from the editors). They speculate on what it would have been like had the Zingbot been in the house all season. Enzo thinks it would have gotten itself punched, but Lane deadpans, "I think it would have been romantically aligned with Kathy."

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Big Brother




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