Battlestar Galactica
The Woman King

Episode Report Card
Jacob Clifton: D | 4 USERS: C+
The Helo Suit

"If we disinfect everything and stress hygiene," says Cottle, which somebody has said in all three Angeli scripts, so add "germophobe" to the list of neuroses, "Some people won't get sick. And, uh, they won't need the medicine." If you think that's self-evident -- that people who aren't sick don't need medicine, or that if you don't give people medicine you still have the medicine you didn't give them, logical tautologies like that -- I must advise that you keep reading. Helo gets all Mayor of Dogville about throwing the Sagittarons into showers and making announcements about how they are filthy, but Robert wants the Sagittarons to himself: "We don't want to single them out anymore than we already have to. We'll have a riot on our hands." Jeez, I wish. Cottle cracks a joke about how they "won't have to worry about having enough medicine for the Sagittarons," right, because Sagittarons don’t believe in medicine, and Adama reiterates this salient fact: "Most of them are gonna refuse it. People are gonna die." Robert makes this weird, kind of chinny-chin-chin face that he makes throughout the episode and in the X-Men movie (where he played a confusingly motivated racist murderer who eventually turned into an aspic, which he does not do in the episode, not even in the deleted scene, not at all): kind of proud, kind of like he's taking a dare, kind of like he's daring you to hassle him. And in the case of Sagittarons dying, all three. Cottle bitches -- and he at least makes sense right here, because being a doctor is his entire personality -- that to them, over the last 3000 years, "medicine's been just the great curse." Tigh explains that this is because they're a bunch of "stubborn, root-sucking jackasses holding onto traditions that are a thousand years old." Which is awkward on the heels of the last line, but not as awkward as the Helo Suit getting its Resolved Face on and making a little black mark next to Tigh's name in its Big Book Of Overbearing Moral Judgments.

Over in Dogville Triage, the Sagittarons are praying and burning herbs and wigging out; Buckminster gives his father some tea. "Stink enough for you in here?" asks Robert, and Helo subtly implies that he's being ungracious: "Yeah, it's a really potent smell." It's burdock root, Robert explains: "Sagittarons use it as a calmative." Robert laughs when Helo asks if it works. "Hell, I don't know. They're all gonna die anyway." Helo Suit is not pleased by this, of course, and nods even as he's making another little mark next to Robert's name. Soon he'll be all alone with his virtue, and then I don't know what will happen.

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Battlestar Galactica




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