Episode 2

Episode Report Card
Daniel: D | Grade It Now!
King Jeremy the Wicked

So the baseball date is at Dodger Stadium, which has all the men squealing, and for once it seems genuine. The gang heads out onto the field, where DeAnna has another surprise for them. Tommy Lasorda strolls out onto the field, carrying some laundry. "Look at this group," he says, and you can clearly see him thinking, "I'm getting paid cash for this, right?" The laundry he's carrying turns out to be Dodgers jerseys for all the guys with their names on the back, as if this group date wasn't already infinitely cooler than the magic show date. Lasorda cracks that it's a tough decision for DeAnna as there's not a good-looking guy in the bunch. Then he gives them a canned managerial speech about how they each have to believe that they can do it. "The pep talk was about the guys winning me over!" squeals DeAnna, who I'm starting to learn prefers things that are all about her.

Next up is the butchering of The Star-Spangled Banner that has been teased before every commercial break, robbing it of the little amusement it did have. Next up: homerun derby! They'll get ten swings, and whoever hits the most home runs gets one-on-one time with DeAnna. "Home run" is stretching it a bit though, as a makeshift fence has been placed across the middle of the outfield. Ron's up first, and after fouling off a few, manages to hit a "home run." In a talking-head, he says the contest awakened a competitiveness he hadn't felt since he got here. Even though it's already a competition? He hits two. Eric doesn't hit any. Robert can't even make contact, which completely pisses off Lasorda, who swears at him. Brian fares better, hitting two. Jesse hits one. Jeremy says he was nervous, having not swung a bat in a while, but he gets a homerun in early, and anyone who's played know that once you get in a groove, you can knock them out there all day; he finishes with an impressive six, including one that was almost approaching the warning track (although, admittedly, he's not exactly facing Rivera in the ninth). Before Chris goes up, we hear in a talking head that he played baseball in the minor leagues. After watching him whiffing, we learn he was a pitcher. D'oh!

So Jeremy heads off to a dugout with DeAnna so they can have a not-at-all-completely-set-up chat about how close Jeremy was to his mom, who died. I mean, when DeAnna's reminding him about how earlier he had said he was close to his mom, and asking him for more details, it seems kinda torqued, you know? Anyway, he talks about how he got his compassion and respect from her. Instead of listening to this, DeAnna's all, "Well, what about your dad?" And ... Jeremy's dad died, too. "I feel bad for even asking," says DeAnna after "discovering" that Jeremy's parents are dead. God, this show. So, anyway, now they have something of a bond, because don't forget DeAnna's mom died when she was 12 (yet getting rejected by Brad was the worst day of her life, remember?).

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