Episode 2

Episode Report Card
Daniel: D | Grade It Now!
King Jeremy the Wicked

Chris Harrison awaits the arrival of the bachelors' limousine at Deanna's mansion, which we'll call Middlesex. He outlines the rules about dates -- dudes on individual dates need to earn roses to stay. Then there's the matter of the accommodations -- three guys will be living up in the mansion with DeAnna, and the first three so honoured are Jeremy, Jesse and Richard, who were the guys who won first impression roses last week. In fact, Deanna's waiting for you inside, so move on in, says Chris. In a talking head, Ron talks about how hard that was, and gripes that the first impression roses actually meant something.

"Welcome home!" chirps DeAnna as the three guys stroll in, and she hugs them, and in a talking head says she truly feels this is the best way to get to know someone. Prostituting yourself on a reality show? OK. Lots of contrasting shots between the mansion and the guesthouse (which isn't exactly a hovel). Although it's a little odd that the guesthouse shower is outside, with no door and no curtain. Meanwhile, DeAnna toasts her three dudes, who later on stroll down the walk to the guest house to the jeers of the other guys.

The Chosen Three are there because they all have to read the date cards together. Jesse says Jason, Ryan, Twilley, Sean, Paul, Fred and Richard are going on a group date. The card says, "Do you believe in magic?" Jason, in a talking head, crows about it's great to be on the first date with DeAnna tonight. "It's a huge advantage," he says, although I'd like him to explain how much of an advantage it can be when almost half the competitors are getting it.

DeAnna says goodbye to her chosen three, and says in a talking head that this is her first date since Brad. If only this show would CONSTANTLY TALK ABOUT BRAD, I would have some idea who he was. If somebody knows who this Brad is, could they put together a three-minute clip package to be played at the beginning of every episode? Thanks.

So the Group of Seven plus DeAnna heads to the Magic Castle, which is a private magician's club, where they get a private performance from a magician who turns a wand into handkerchiefs, and then into a dove, which he gives to Jason, joking about giving him the bird. "That might be the only date you have tonight," he says, clearly forgetting about the Palm sisters. He makes DeAnna his assistant, and then asks her to pick another helper. She picks Jason, and the magician puts the two of them in a big box before disappearing the two of them. Silence from the rest of the bachelors as they realize that DeAnna is gone.

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