Guise Will Be Guise

Episode Report Card
Strega: D | 2 USERS: A-
Ham in a Hard Role

So before the show actually starts, Johanna calls me to see who can make the nastiest comment about how lame Buffy was. The ad for next week's crossover "event" comes on while we're talking, and we stop mid-conversation to squeal when Spike suddenly lunges into the frame. I'll be talking about this more later. And watching it over and over again for the next week. I'm just saying.

Previously on Angel: Darla's simpering blah blah blah Lindsey's bad hair blah blah blah Angel's angstcakes.

Wesley, who can't decide whether or not to tuck his shirt in, putters around behind the front desk of the Hyperion. He tugs on a drawer that won't open, tugs harder, and it flies out, spilling its contents all over the floor. Oh good. Wesley's doing physical comedy again. I grab my first-aid kit and begin wrapping bandages around my torso, to ensure that I don't accidentally break a rib with my hearty laughter. By the time I'm done with that, some guy with a very deep voice has entered, causing a kneeling Wesley to bump his noggin as he jumps up. The deep-voiced guy wants to see Angel. Angel's not there. Wesley falls down on the spilled papers. Thank god for those bandages. The deep-voiced guy expresses displeasure at Angel's absence, and leaves. Wesley begins picking up papers as Cordy enters. She says, "I found him, and we have to stop him before it's too late. We have to change our -- do you have any clothes a man would wear?" The bandages hold as I actually emit a slight snicker. It's not really that funny, but frankly, if an extra walked up to Wesley and said, "Doofus," I'd laugh, because I hate Wesley.

Cut to the Wolfram & Hart building. A grating in the floor opens and Angel and Gunn climb out. So, after the big break-in last season, apparently Wolfram & Hart decided that the vague if not non-existent function of those large, convenient gratings more than makes up for the giant security risk they pose. 'Kay. Angel and Gunn spot a couple of lawyers down the hall, and sneak past them into the elevator. Oh wait, those aren't lawyers -- they're Cordy and Wesley in clever disguises! I know this because they follow Angel and Gunn into the elevator and begin to cause a not-at-all-stealthy scene. For the sake of my aching fingers, let's take it as read that when Angel speaks, he presses a button to close the elevator doors, and when Cordy speaks, she presses a button to re-open those doors. Angel asks what they're doing. Cordy says that they're saving his life. Gunn asks how she and Wesley got in, and Wesley says they used the front entrance. Cordy puts on glasses and says, "Hello, lawyer." That's a brilliant disguise. Angel insists that he has to find her, and I think we all know who "her" is. In case we don't, Cordy says, "Still with the Darla of it." Which isn't actually a sentence, but she somehow manages to convey meaning with it anyway. Wesley asks whether Gunn supports this idea, and Gunn says that he's just along for the ride. If the ride ever starts, what with the duel over the elevator doors. Cordy reminds the audience of something I've been thinking about ever since the grating opened: "They have vampire detectors!"

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