Blood Money

Episode Report Card
Strega: D+ | 1 USERS: D
Blood Money

Up on the balcony, Zorn pushes back his hood and it turns out that it's actually Angel. Fancy that. How'd he get in without alerting Zorn? Well, presumably Boone took care of Zorn. I guess. Angel turns around and there's Boone, saying, "I was afraid you weren't going to show. You are ready to finish this?" Boone was afraid Angel wouldn't show up for the key part of the plan that they worked out so carefully together?

Lilah is wrapping things up downstairs, thanking the celebrities for their help. Shot of the stars waving and grinning at the crowd, while through gritted teeth, Holden says "I'm gonna kill my agent!" Lilah thanks everyone for their donations, but then they're all distracted by the noise of a fracas. Why, lookee there! Boone and Angel appear to be engaged in battle! Punch, thump, and they both tumble over the wall and down to the ballroom floor. Some goons grab Angel, and Lindsey says, "Did you really think we weren't gonna be ready for you?" He pats Angel down and asks where the tape is. Boone elbows Lindsey aside, saying, "He doesn't have it," and then sidles up to Angel and asks if he's okay. Oh, those two scamps; they're like Tom and Huck all over again. Angel looks behind him and says, "I'm just here for the show." Lilah figures out that Anne has the MacGuffin. Anne slowly walks toward the music / video console as she pulls the tape out of her purse. The gathered infotainment journalists begin eagerly recording the events, because they are psychic and know that something interesting is about to happen. Sure enough, Lindsey and Lilah begin a mad dash through the crowd toward Anne. The crowd watches. The lawyers run. Anne pops the tape in and presses play. This scene is taking three hours. And then the tape starts. We see feet, and hear Wesley asking how to turn the camera on. Cordy tells Wesley to give her the camera. In a stunning plot twist, they proceed to bicker. Then the scene changes, and Cordelia is berating a coat rack for cheating on her. The audience is bemused. Holden tells Serena, "I sorta believe the coat rack more." Now Cordelia is enjoying a big glass of milk. "Mmm, milk," she says, in varying tones. Lilah asks Lindsey, "What's happening?" As the scene changes again to Wesley doing a soft-shoe for the camera, Angel explains, "Looks to me like you two were acting like a couple of crazy people. On camera, too. Ouch." Lindsey and Lilah are suitably abashed. Because, wow, they were running through a crowd. And they can't possibly think of any excuse to justify their behavior. Not even the slightest bit of sense is being made here. Meanwhile, Wesley does an impression of Sean Connery as James Bond. Serena asks, "Isn't that the guy who's dating Virginia Bryce?" Wesley dances in a wifebeater and begins to undo his belt. The crowd laughs. Reed looks flummoxed. I begin to whimper. Lindsey realizes that Angel doesn't have any tape recording of evidence. Lindsey's super-duper smart, isn't he? Angel merrily says, "Do you know how hard it is to secretly record someone as paranoid as you two [sic] ?" Wesley, in his underwear, appears to be fondling himself. Writing that sentence took ten years off my life. Lindsey guesses that Angel hired Boone. Angel says, "No, you did. For a whole lot of money, too." "The money!" Lilah gasps, and she and Lindsey race off again. They reach the table and see that their flunkies are unconscious, and the big bag o' loot is gone.

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