America's Next Top Model

Episode Report Card
Potes: B+ | 1 USERS: B-
We Know This World Is Killing You

Claire, of course, has that weird half-shaved head, which doesn't leave Tyra with a lot of options. All she can do is shave the other side, buzz the top except for a little pouf, and dye the whole thing platinum. It's sort of mid-'80s Annie Lennox, and I'm not totally sure how I feel about it yet. It seems like it can go a little Ed Grimley.

Fatima's hair is currently a monstrosity, so Tyra's going to dye it a chestnut brown and give her a long-ass weave. Fatima complains a little that it hurts. Allison totally thinks this is retribution. Allison is feeling pretty comfy in her hair chair given that she has those big cushy ass cheeks to sit on.

Speaking of Allison, she goes a light brown and gets a little weave. She says that her dark hair and cynical look are gone, but that she can easily slip back into the dark cynical Allison if need be. The lighter hair kind of softens the edges of her vampire fangs, and makes her look like Kate Beckinsale.

Dominique, says Tyra-vision, has worked so hard and suffered so hard and understands how important this competition is, so she is going to get the worst makeover by far. Her hair gets chopped. She thinks that the hair captures the high-fashion look and is fierce as hell. I think she looks like a librarian via No Country For Old Men.

Stacy-Ann is dying for a Naomi Campbell weave. She does not get it. Tyra-vision squeaks that Stacy-Ann has such beautiful bone structure that she doesn't need any long hair. So, they make her look like Buckwheat. Work that, you happy bitch! When she's revealed to herself in the mirror, Stacy-Ann laughs in that sort of painful way and says, "Woooow, oh my gosh, that is different." Stacy-Ann doesn't love it, and it's not what she expected, but to her credit, she doesn't complain, and just says that she has no choice in the matter and has to bring it. For some reason, this haircut makes her head look ENORMOUS.

Next there's Crazy Amis. She has a long head, according to Tyra-vision, so what would suit her most would be a long weave. It's long and blonde and pretty, and Amis thinks she might just turn into some sort of roaring sex monster. She's already got the "monster" part down, after all.

Meanwhile, Fatima is still crying about the administering of her weave. Allison has no patience for the bitching and moaning. Fatima says it was the most painful experience. Uhhhh...well, okay. I'm just going to leave that one alone. When it's done, though, she loves it and feels like it brings out her East African features. It's an ENORMOUS improvement.

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America's Next Top Model




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