America's Next Top Model

Episode Report Card
Potes: A- | 1 USERS: A+
Honk If You Love Honkies!
In a hurry? Read the recaplet for a nutshell description!

Hi all! Before I begin, I must make a correction to last week's recap. Thanks to Alaskan native Hilary for writing to tell me that, in fact, there really ARE no billboards in Alaska! Apparently, state law prohibits them. I really just thought it was Hannah being dumb and all, "Aw, shucks, fellas! What's this newfangled electric light bulb you're all talking about?" So Hannah gets one point, which leaves the score so far at: Potes - 148; Hannah - 1.

Previously on ANTM: Bitches! Magicians! A fierce stand on political issues and getting out to vote! And, in a rare act of mercy toward her viewers, Tyra gave Sharaun the boot. The unlucky thirteen remain! Na na na na na na!

It is night, and the girls' eco-friendly bus is still fierce. The girls return home from judging to find Marjorie's photo displayed digitally, as promised. She feels good about it. And then we get down to business. Nikeysha tells the other girls that she talks too much because she feels the need to explain herself. Girl, the crazy on your face is apparent to everyone, so you really don't have to put so much effort into explanation. Nikeysha interviews that the judges got the wrong impression of her. Exactly how that impression is wrong, she does not say. Instead she points out how she kept talking over Tyra and Tyra wanted to get in a damn word. Which would, in fact, indicate that the judges had exactly the right impression of her. Nikeysha tells us that at the next panel she's going to keep her mouth shut. If she really wants to follow through with that promise, I suggest she find some lip sutures quick.

Tyra Mail! In this week's delivery photo, Tyra is positively orgasmic that all the letters have fallen out of her mailbag. She also pounds the pavement through rain, snow, sleet and hail in five-inch ankle strap stilettos. No wonder the cost of stamps went up again. The Tyra Mail says: "Don't get it twisted. Will you bend over backwards to be on top? Love, Tyra." Sheena says that hell yes, she will. I feel like she gives that answer every time someone asks her to bend over. Cut to Isis who reminds us that she had the second best photo last week. Her biggest challenge, she says, is working with her face and making sure it's soft and pretty. Like sugar and spice and everything nice! I sure hope Isis doesn't underestimate the awesomeness of her face when it's finger-waving fierce.

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America's Next Top Model




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