America's Next Top Model
The Girls Who Go Down Under

Episode Report Card
Potes: B | 1 USERS: A+
The Girl Who Can Hear, But Not Remember, The Thunder
In a hurry? Read the recaplet for a nutshell description!

Previously on ANTM: Dionne and Renee reunited with their whiny brats and various other assorted family members. Several ANTM has-beens came back for the week's photo shoot in a sort of genetically blessed reunion (but without Great-Uncle Ernie playing the ukulele, which is what always happens at my family reunions). Natasha rocked it even with fake dots of flesh-eating bacteria all over her face, Jael fell flat in her attempt at recreating a Vagus-nerve-induced fainting spell, and Whitney was let loose to no longer terrorize the world of modeling. Six bitches remain!

We enter with Jael and Jaslene talking. Jael says that something -- we are to deduce that it is the experience of being on Top Model -- is awesome. Jaslene says that it's getting harder and she's trying her ass off, but she doesn't like hearing that she's going down, down, down. Under! Oh, sorry, I thought we were playing Password. Jaslene tells Jael that she thinks they're making it harder for her. Okay, first of all, who are "they," and why does this mysterious "they" have something against Jaslene? Is it the voices in her head, or the little angel/devil drag queens on her shoulders? Jaslene interviews that she needs to step up her game and says that the pressure is on all the time.

Brittany tells us that it's exciting to be in the final six. She's halfway through, she says, and she did a good job. She says that she guesses she needs to stand out. Hmm, methinks it might be time to pull out a long-lost personal tragedy! Natasha tells Jael that in Moscow, she had so many friends, and they would go out all the time. Jael asks if there are a lot of pretty girls in Moscow, and Natasha answers in the affirmative. Is Jael now looking for a low-cost wife? Natasha interviews that growing up in Moscow, she always believed that she could do something bigger than marrying some guy from the next door. So she married some guy from the Texas instead. Natasha says that she feels so strong, and like she doesn't have any competition. She tells Jael that American girls are pretty, but in a different way. You know, a kind of generically unattractive way. Jael says that everyone in the house is eccentric, and that's why she thinks she deserves to be there. Yeah, but it's not called America's Next Top Eccentric, is it? Jael has complete faith in herself, because she is the spreader of light. Light's not all she's spreading, if you catch my drift. There's a whole long list of things, of which bacteria is most definitely first.

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America's Next Top Model




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