America's Next Top Model

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Potes: B | Grade It Now!
Just Let The Bitch In The Shower, Already

The girls return home. Heather, lagging behind the other girls by about five feet, mumbles, "I call shower." There is Tyra Mail. "Feeling burnt out by the competition? Get ready, 'cause the heat is on!" Chantal interviews that she is getting burnt out by the competition. The girls are together 24-7, and there's no privacy. Seriously, I am just waiting for the season one of the girls gets all Dexter on the rest of the house. Oh, wait, maybe that, in fact, will be this season. To wit: Lisa and Saleisha go running into the shower. Heather, as she says in her interview, thought to herself, "No." Heather unhooks her bra and heads into the shower, looking kind of scary, and not just because she's naked. She says that she called the shower first. Bianca and Jenah observe and laugh from the bathroom sink. Heather interviews that they know very damn well that she called the shower first, and that she's not having the best of days. Can I just stop the action for a minute here and ask why everyone's showering together? If there are any pre-teen boys out there who are all like, "SCORE, DUDE! I knew that real life was just like Cinemax After Dark!," let me assure you that it, in fact, is not. Heather screams at Lisa and Saleisha in the shower that what they did was bullshit, and Saleisha quite pragmatically screams back that Heather's in the shower now, so she should shut up. Heather -- who, it can't be denied, is in the middle of washing her hair -- doesn't have a whole lot to say to that. Lisa and Saleisha are cracking up. Heather interviews that the other girls forget that she has a breaking point, too. I would contend that the other girls actually never forget that Heather has a breaking point, nor do they forget that it's kind of hilarious to see it in action. To wit, Bianca knocks on the shower door and tells Heather that she needs to come pick up her underwear. Heather interviews that the other girls feel a need to pick at her when she's not acting like her happy, cheery self. And again, I think they like to pick at her because she then becomes her regular old weird self, times 1000. Ambreal notes that Heather snaps sometimes, and that you just can't do that. Saleisha interviews that Heather looked like she wanted to do voodoo on her, and that she decided not to mess with her anymore, and just to shower and get the heck up out of there. Wise choice. Heather looks like she's contemplating whether to stick the pin in the eye or the esophagus first.

When Heather gets out of the shower, Bianca asks her why she's so upset. Heather brings up her terrible critique, and Bianca asks whether she thinks she's going to be perfect at everything. Heather says that she just wants to do well, and Bianca says that she didn't, and has to be better next time. Heather brushes her wet hair in slow motion, and looks not a little like Samara from The Ring. She's totally going to rock the next photo shoot if she can make her way back up out of the well. Commercials.

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America's Next Top Model




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