America's Next Top Model
The Girl Who Makes A Disclaimer

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Bye, Curious

Meanwhile, Sarah is on the phone with her BOYFRIEND. Ooh, this adds an interesting angle, doesn't it? She tells him that she and Kim are "flirty," and that the only thing that makes it weird is that Kim is gay. I would contend that that's the only thing that makes it not weird, but whatever. Boyfriend says, "Oh! I'll just say goodbye now," which I think is kind of a departure from what the average eighteen-year-old straight guy would say. Sarah gives a bunch of "no, no, no"s and says, "I don't swing that way and you know it." I want a bolt of lightning to come from the sky and zap her. Sarah's boyfriend says that she might swing that way. Might and did, sweetie. Sarah tearfully interviews, "I feel very confused right now, I guess, and I have the memory of me but it's so tangled right now. I don't know where I am or where I stand." So you like girls. Live it, learn it, love it, Boonville. ["More like Poonville." -- Wing Chun] She hangs up the phone and has a look of liar's remorse as we fade to commercials.

Meanwhile, in another installment of My Life as a Cover Girl, Naima finally wins the golden ticket hidden in a tube of Wetslicks and gets to tour the Cover Girl factory in Baltimore. You can't make this shit up.

The girls arrive to their photo shoot and meet Mr. Jay, who is walking on a treadmill in front of a green screen. He says that their shoot will be full of Hollywood-style special effects, and that they'll be running on the treadmill as if there is something terrifying behind them, like the avian flu or the giant blown-up face of Lisa. They are not going to know what the terrifying thing will be -- it will be put in as a post effect. Mike Rosenthal is the photographer. The girls are all going to be styled as fashion victims, each with something a little wrong about her. This shoot is kind of busy conceptually, but at least they won't be wearing clown makeup.

Jay pulls aside Cassandra and Jayla for a special talking-to while the others go to hair and makeup. He tells Jayla that they're going to take out her extensions, because they're not working for her. Jayla interviews that you may not like it at first but that you have to get into it and try to see the good in it, and really, she could be talking about her own foray into same-sex loving or anything else. Jay tells Cassandra that Tyra wants to cut her hair even shorter in true Mia Farrow style. She replies that she's not comfortable cutting it again when she hasn't even had the chance to work it yet. Jay says that if she told that to a client, they would cut her loose. The other girls look on. Jay says that they can't do the shoot if she doesn't have the hair they want, and tells her to have some breakfast and think about it and that he'll get back to her in a few.

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America's Next Top Model

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