America's Next Top Model
The Girl Who Makes A Disclaimer

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Bye, Curious

Time for elimination! Tyra has only nine photos in her hand. The first name she calls is Jayla, who gets mad props all around for being called first. Next is Kyle, who changed the minds of unimpressed judges with her walk. Nik is called next, then Bre (who has an average picture but a great walk). Lisa is next, then Diane, Coryn, and Nicole. Kim and Sarah are left. Oh no! Two lovers torn apart by the cruel, cruel UPN! Sarah starts crying instantly because no matter what happens, she's heading back to the Boonville High Hetero Club. Tyra says that Sarah wants to be a model so much, but falls apart when she is asked to perform. Kim, on the other hand, really wants it but is still confused about who (s)he is, and goes so far as to make an irksome disclaimer, which only points to her negative qualities. Tyra tells Kim not to do that again, and hands her a photo. Sarah flips around and totally holds Kim in a lovers' embrace, even rubbing her hair. Sarah then goes and has the same kind of embrace with Coryn only, so who knows what's going on there.

Back at the house, an ungainly fashion victim Sarah says that even though she didn't win, she "learned things" about herself, so it was worth it. She says that Kim taught her a lot of things, like the fact that it really is a Rubyfruit Jungle out there, and that she's stronger than she thought it was. She says, "I wish I could learn more," and I am so intrigued by the fact that she is still riding Kim's jock. Back to Boonville for Sarah, and who knows what from there. But wow, does she have a lot of explaining to do to that boyfriend.

Next on ANTM: no more lesbian love affairs. Er, but there is an impromptu topless photo shoot. All righty, then. Also, Lisa tells Coryn to stop working out, and Coryn gives her a beating with the she-nis.

And I must tell all you bitches that I have just turned thirty and so am treating myself to a proper vacation. Woohoo! So next week, Jeff will be taking over my recapping duties as I saunter around Ireland. Be nice to him, and know that if a she-nis of any kind is revealed while I'm away I'm going to die.

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America's Next Top Model

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