America's Next Top Model
The Girl Who Makes A Disclaimer

Episode Report Card
Potes: B+ | Grade It Now!
Bye, Curious

We are introduced to panel by a horrible picture of Tyra bedecked in a series of fashion don'ts. Given her close affiliation with Victoria's Secret, I think almost any picture of Tyra generally could fall under the heading of "fashion don'ts." Tyra reviews the prizes and re-introduces the judges. Sue Wong is the week's guest judge, and yells at Tyra to pose like an Anglican fishmonger. Tyra talks to the girls about Cassandra's decision to not cut her hair, which was also a decision to leave the show. She says that models need to adapt to a variety of situations. Cassandra was more interested in her hair than she was in adapting and learning. Tyra advises the rest of the girls to think long and hard and either commit to trying to become a top model or step forward and leave right then and there. Tyra asks if anyone wants to go home, and notes that Lisa appears to be thinking. Lisa says she's not going anywhere, despite the wishes of the rest of the free world. And for a moment, I wish that Cassandra had stuck around just so that Tyra could publicly bitch-slap her in front of the panel. Anyway, no one else leaves.

Tyra says that she's excited about the upcoming challenge and asks how many of the girls are familiar with Cycle 2 Camille. She asks what Camille said, and Bre answers that Camille said she had a signature walk that was going to make her famous. We see footage of Camille and oh, how I miss the first two seasons. Tyra says that, today, the girls will be tested on a signature walk that they now get five minutes to develop. How can it be a signature walk if you just make it up on the spot? Top Model's signature feature is idiocy.

The girls walk in a procession, to all sorts of crazy looks from the judges. A little extra oomph introduces Bre. Tyra says, "Work it out" and Nigel lustily says, "Come on." She clomps and clomps to approving looks. Sarah is predictably terrible, causing Nigel to actually put his head in his hands and laugh. Then comes Kim. Before walking, she points to Miss J. and says, "I just want to say before I walk that I know I didn't make you proud the other day, but I want to show you that I'm going to keep improving, I'm going to keep practicing, and it's gonna get better." And if you are wondering whether this was a good idea, be instructed by Miss J.'s reply to her, "Okay, I hope so, 'cause you on my list girl to be [scissors motion with fingers]." Her walk is kind of stiff and weird. After she leaves, Tyra asks the other judges what was up with the disclaimer. Nigel says the subtext was, "Excuse me, I'm about to do really badly. Don't judge me." The panel is not pleased.

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America's Next Top Model




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