America's Next Top Model
The Girl Who Has A Temper

Episode Report Card
Potes: B | Grade It Now!
Double Trouble

Joanie is first to go. Jay tells her that the camera is shooting from a low point to emphasize the shoes, and that she should stick out her leg to make it look really long. Joanie dances somewhat whoreishly as the krumpers krump. This all reminds me of the most awesome cable-access show, which airs Sunday mornings in Rhode Island and has footage of people dancing at this cheesy five-clubs-in-one place in Providence called The Complex. If you never thought that you looked stupid while you were drunkenly grinding with your friend and hiking up the strap of your thong, this show proves you wrong. Seriously, move to Rhode Island just so you can watch it. Jay says that the only problem he had with Joanie was that occasionally she'd get a mean mugging face, which is also known as the expression that you think looks fierce while you're getting down but actually makes you appear to have some sort of facial deformity. Which Joanie actually might have anyway.

Next is Furonda. Jay says that if she doesn't bring it, her black sisters will shame her in the streets, just as Jay's orange people shamed him in the grove when they discovered that he didn't know how to dress. The orange are known for their sense of style. Jay asks if Furonda can dance, and she says that she can. He tells her that if she doesn't get into it, it won't work. She is so skinny. Jay says she looks a little like a limp rag doll, and asks for more.

Backstage, Jay tells an anxious Brooke not to freak out and let her nerves consume her. Furonda says that Brooke is a mess, and has really been letting the situation with Nnenna get to her. Brooke notes that she does tend to freeze up when she feels the stress. Meanwhile, Jade dances violently in a weird purple one-piece bathing suit, further endangering the limited brain cells remaining with each whip of her head.

Danielle's shoot is next, and Jay tells her to make the black girls proud. Danielle says that, at home, her friends all call her a white girl. Oh, I knew there was a reason I like her so much. Jay asks with surprise if she means that she can't dance, and Danielle says she's going to do what she does. Jay tells her that if she thinks of a white girl, she should at least think of Irene Cara. Good example. But there is no need to worry about Danielle, because she works it out. Black girls everywhere beam with pride.

Next is Sara, who looks super-gawky and kind of hangs her mouth agape. She says that she was definitely conscious of her height and trying to get the right angles. She sticks her legs up a lot, which, I guess, could be effective.

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America's Next Top Model




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