America's Next Top Model
The Girl Who Graduates

Episode Report Card
Potes: B | 1 USERS: A+
Stay In School, Bitches

Brooke says that she was expecting their co-star to be someone young and hot and full of testosterone. Instead, they get the missing link. Yes, their photo co-star is Fabio. It is true that this is his genre. We see some of his romance novel covers, and the titles are as such: Rogue, Pirate, and Gentle Rogue. Do you guys think that Gentle Rogue is the sequel to Rogue? I'd hate to read them out of order and miss some important plot point.

First up is CariDee, who was pretty much born to be a peasant in love with a rich man. She does a brilliant job. Jay tells her that it was beyond orgasmic. Gross, man. Next up is Amanda, who is leaving her man for another woman. She says that it's kind of a confusing character for her and she doesn't know how she's going to get into it. Yes, we know you're not the gay one. Fabio thinks that Amanda has a great look and great potential, but she seemed nervous. Jay asks her what she's thinking about, and she says her boyfriend. Again, we can tell you apart by now. Jay tells us that Amanda has been consistently fair -- not bad, not good. Just average. Fabio hangs out with the twins and asks if they are inseparable. They say that no, they are very separable. Hmmm, that seems like a bit of foreshadowing, doesn't it? Not as much foreshadowing as the graduation package, but you get the picture. Jay says that Michelle's shot is an intimate one, so she shouldn't have any hopes for personal space. She interviews that she's never been in a relationship, so lying in bed with a man and a baby is kind of different for her. She says that it was fun and uncomfortable at the same time. Jay says that Michelle is usually very good on set, but today her body was very uncomfortable. Fabio is kind of nuzzling her ear. I can see how that might cause discomfort.

Cleopatra Anchal is next, and Jay tells her that the competition is getting tougher, and the judges will be looking in the photos for who is engaging themselves and who isn't. Anchal says that she can't let her shyness or low self-esteem get in the way of this important photo shoot. She isn't thinking about her weight, and uses the fact that she has boobs to her advantage. Jay notes that Anchal grabbed the bull by the horns. So to speak. Fabio thought that she took direction very well, was very sexy, and was totally believable. Good job, Anchal! Now stop whining please.

Eugena the secret lover is next. Jay asks her if she ever has really been a secret lover, and she says she has. She was trying so hard to hide the way she felt. Because she (and her secret lover) both belonged to someone else, but they couldn't let go. Because what they felt, was oh so real. So real. So real. [Bridge.] And speaking of that song, is there a better lyric out there than, "In the middle of making love we notice the time?" Like, what a buzzkill that would be. Jay wants Eugena to hussy it up a little, and also to have a neck. He says that she was working on a three-quarter tank of gas, and needed to step it up.

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America's Next Top Model




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