America's Next Top Model

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Potes: B- | Grade It Now!
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Saleisha is "car parts." They just wanted to put someone in front of some big old tires. Ebony is bubble wrap. So, clearly they mean "recycling" in the manner of "using again for some other purpose" in addition to "putting out in your bin on Monday night, then getting woken up by the ferocious clanging when said bin is dumped into the truck." Jay asks Ebony to be less severe and to find some happiness. If only she had a hot, moist teapot nearby. Jay tells us that last week, Ebony was on top of the competition, but this week, she was uninspired and even a little trampish. She's wearing a necklace made of gold Christmas bulbs. What do you want out of the poor girl? Jay tries to give Ebony some feedback after the shoot, and she gives her customary tight-lipped "okay" and walks away. Jay says she's so lackluster he doesn't know what to do.

Next, Jenah is cardboard. She looks really great in her retro cardboard ensemble. Jay tells us that Jenah consistently listens to the advice she's given, and that's what you expect from a working model. Bianca is "oil," and poses in front of a wall with empty motor oil bottles on it. I'm sure the contents of said bottles were used to water the bushes outside of the studio. Waste not want not -- wrong! Jay is impressed that Bianca has suddenly learned how to smile with her eyes, and notes that it's Tyra's favorite trick to teach the girls. Oh, we know. Bianca has been practicing a lot, and is glad to know that her hard work has been acknowledged. Lisa is plastic bottles, and Jay loves the way she uses her limbs. Ambreal is next up as newspaper, and she tells us that she was nervous and praying that she got some wonderful pictures. The only reason God's interested in her right now is because he's trying to read Calvin & Hobbes. Ambreal wants to prove that she deserves to be there. Jay tells her that she looks inexperienced, as opposed to when she walked into the competition looking experienced. He tells her not to force it, and asks an assistant when Ambreal forgot how to model. Jay interviews that she had one of the easiest outfits to work, and one of the most dynamic sets, but her shoot was boring and uninspiring. He tells Ambreal that she's second-guessing herself and on a slippery downward slop of suck. She has an innate sensibility, he says, so he expects more from her. A teary Ambreal tells us that it's heartbreaking, because she really wants to model, and doesn't want to go home. Unlike a certain ingrate we'll see more of momentarily. Commercials.

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America's Next Top Model




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