America's Next Top Model

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Potes: B+ | 1 USERS: A+
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Smile and Pose

Alasia is up next, working some very high hair and giant eyes. We breeze by her, so I'm assuming she does fine. Raina actually has eyeballs painted on her eyelids, so even when her eyes are closed they look open. That is freaky and I want to do it always. She has giant fake lashes as well, and kind of looks like one of those three-headed baby dolls with the slow-moving eyes that haunt my nightmares. Jay tells us that Raina really noticed what the makeup artist did with her face, and really sold the look. Jessica feels really stupid in her getup, but is determined to push harder and harder to impress the judges even more. Jay asks for extreme poses, and Jessica delivers. She pops up and down like there's a trampoline beneath her, and generally just rocks it. Jay loves it, and says that she embodied this creative and made it work, and that's what you book a top model for. She nailed it.

Krista is next, with some bright green fur and leggings. Jay loves her awkward posing. Brenda is decked out in orange, and Jay tells her to wake up. He thinks that she can do better. At this point, I'm not so sure. Backstage, Anslee gets some sympathy from a member of the glam squad. Basically, she's pouting up a storm. She tells us that she was emotionally distraught, and that she commanded herself to get it together and show the judges who she is. Anslee wears a Lady Gaga wig and vows to be everything she is -- bubbly, outgoing, and stupid. Despite her intentions, however, she falls flat on set. Jay tells her that she looks skanky, and then she kind of just stands there dead-eyed. He thinks she couldn't figure out what she was there to do today -- basically, she was lost. Anslee tries jumping half-heartedly, and almost breaks an ankle. She does a bit better toward the end, but when the shoot's over Jay says that she had a mad case of fashion constipation. Anslee tells him that she had a rough start to her morning, but is doing better. She's proud that she didn't have a total meltdown. On this show, I guess that's something.

And then there's Angelea. Dear, sweet, Angelea. She struts to set, resplendent in her fakery. She looks amazing, and her absolute weirdness works to her great advantage. She is a woman who can wear giant eyelashes in the crease of her eyelid. Alexandra is next, and tells us that she's no longer overly confident like she was in the past. Yeah, I'm guessing that giant pendulum took care of the hubris but good. At this point, she's pushing herself to do well. Jay tells her that he needs her to sell the extreme nature of the shoot's concept. Alexandra gives it a shot, but Jay is none too enthused about her performance. He tells us that Alexandra is usually his favorite and lets nothing attack her confidence, but today she fell short of herself. He tells her that it wasn't bad, but it was obvious that her special spark wasn't there today. On that sparkless note, it's a wrap! As Alexandra mourns about not being able to prove to anyone else that she deserves to be there, we head to commercials.

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America's Next Top Model

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