America's Next Top Model

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Bus-ted

Kortnie and Nijah are next, and they are artists in Soho, where Jay loves to shop. Not only are they artists, but they are artists studying their muses. From the beginning they don't seem to have a firm grasp of what they're supposed to be doing, or the ability to do it. Nijah kind of crouches down like she threw her back out, which Jay points out is not pretty. Nijah confessionalizes that it's one thing to do a photo shoot on your own, but it's even more difficult to have to work with somebody else, not to mention someone as fat as Kortnie. You have to make sure that you get a picture where you both look good. Sadly for Nijah, she is the one who is having the trouble looking good. Both Jay and Mike tell her that she needs to be more dynamic. Kortnie starts to give it, and Jay tells Nijah to take it there. I mean, she has a pink tutu and a cello. How could she not take it there?

Sandra and Celia are up next, and are posing as fabulous yet negligent nannies. Celia is apprehensive, as she does not know whether you are supposed to hold babies upside down by the feet or what. Sandra looks as if she has had a great fright and her hair turned static-y and white. Jay has to tell the two women to relate more with each other, and then he starts complimenting what Sandra is doing with her hand. In the end, Jay seems pleased with how they did. /P>

London and Allison are next as Upper East Side snobby socialites. Allison tells us that this isn't really her forte, but she thinks that being paired up with London will be good. They're on 5th Avenue and Jay tells them that this is their chance to live out all of their snotty fantasies. Hey, I'll take a turn at that! He wants them to act a scene rather than pose. As it turns out, London does a great job of turning up the bitch when called upon. Secretly, I think Jesus kind of likes it. Allison, however, is having a bit of a hard time being convincing in her bitchery. She's trying to channel "snobby bitch girl" in her eyes, but figures that she was probably overthinking as usual. She appears to be very sad under her black sequined cap.

Finally there is Tahlia, Natalie and Teyona. Tahlia is trying to be as positive as possible even though the dreaded Natalie is also in her photo group. She has no say in the matter, so figures that the best strategy is to just get over it. I concur! These three are portraying tourists in Times Square, which involves a lot of pointing and looking very happy to see so many lights and tall buildings. At one point Teyona decides a snack is in order, and Jay tells her that he doesn't think anyone wants to see a mouthful of pretzel. So the bitch spits it out over the side of the double decker bus! Some poor actual tourist is going back to Omaha telling everyone that it rains soggy dough in the Big Apple. Jay and Mike crack up at my joke. The shoot is going well, and Tahlia is standing out in a good way. Jay tells the others to feed off of her energy, and Natalie does not look pleased. She holds up her hands in a pantomime camera shape, and Jay asks her why she doesn't just pick up the actual camera from the floor of the bus. He's so literal, isn't he? Jay tells us that he looks at Natalie and sees model, but she just doesn't give model on set. Tahlia once again gets singled out for praise, and Natalie interviews that this was surprising, since she's such an underdog. She gives a half-hearted, "Good for her," and says that in the end what matters is that she gets a good photo, too. With the shoot over, Jay tells Tahlia that she was the shocker of the day. Tahlia gives credit to her conversation with her sister, who made her feel like herself again.

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America's Next Top Model

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