America's Next Top Model
Jessica Sutta and Nadine Coyle

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Spice Up Your Tooch
In a hurry? Read the recaplet for a nutshell description!

Previously on America's Next Top Model: British Invasion: Despite allowing herself to be doused with maple syrup and fake leaves from Michael's craft store, Scottish Ashley got the boot. The bright side for her is that she got out before they started tooching. Five American bitches remain, along with four Brits!

The ladies return home post-panel to find a big ol' box of goodies in celebration of Eboni's best-of-week photo victory. The Brits try to sneak off with some of the gifts, but if you think Seymone is going to let anyone take tacky cheap crap that rightfully belongs to her, you are mistaken. Alisha holds up a notebook in the confessional upon which is written, "I'm not talking until I'm picture of the week Fuck's sake." Crickets chirp in response.

Meanwhile, Laura sits alone on the pool deck. She reminds us that just before she came on the show, her best friend Kevin died. It turns out that Kevin had given Laura a stuffed animal, which she then named Alan. I know that's an odd naming choice, but it really isn't relevant in this particular incident. Sophie wrenches Alan from Laura's hands, saying he needs a bath, and then runs down to the pool and dangles him over the water. Laura says that she will kill Sophie if she drops it, but at this moment it looks like everyone including Laura is just being dumb and goofing around. But then as Laura grabs Alan, his ear rips off in Annaliese's hand. Annaliese in turn drops the ear in the pool, and Laura starts wailing, "How can you guys do this to me waaaaaaaaaaaaaah!" At this point, the others are still laughing and all hell has not quite broken loose.

And then Kyle, like, dips a foot in the water. Laura tells us, "As the ear fell in the pool, Kyle pushed it away. It was as if Kevin was being pushed away from me and there was nothing I could do to get him back." I think it's a testament to how hated Kyle is that she gets the bulk of the blame in this situation over someone who actually damaged the stuffed animal and threw its ripped ear into the water. I think she's annoying, too, but it seems a little unfair to blame her for 1) anything involving the stuffed animal; 2) the fact that Laura's best friend is dead. Laura cries and screams and walks away, and everyone is like, WTF? Sophie surmises that the teddy must have had sentimental value, and wonders what the hell she's done as we head into credits.

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America's Next Top Model




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