America's Next Top Model

Episode Report Card
Potes: A- | 1 USERS: A-
What It Do, Shorty?

The girls unpack, and Bambi Eyes Rachel says that it might be anal, but she put her initials on all her clothes. Bianca says that isn't anal, because people steal. And if anyone even tries to wear her clothes, she'll serve them up some Serena Williams-style stank racket abuse. Brittany tells us that Bianca often gives attitude that is really unnecessary. She might not even realize it -- it's just how she is. Which essentially means that Bianca just sucks. And to think she was my early favorite in the first half of the episode! I underestimated the tenacity of the black bitch archetype. And then, there is the opposite of stank. It's Laura, who says that her grandma actually made her clothes. The backstory goes a little something like this. Laura knows that she's not the most fashionable, but she's going to keep trying to be a model. She says she can do it, because she got this far.

Several of the girls relax in the hot tub. Lisa interviews that she's a bit on edge being there, since she was initially cut in favor of a Crazyface and wasn't a first choice. She hopes her personality shines through. Bloody Eyeball Nicole's personality is shining through in a different way, as she embraces her role as outcast. She's been made fun of a lot, and feels different from the other girls. However, she doesn't think this is a weakness in any way whatsoever. Okay, Bloody Eyeball for the win.

There's a bank -- nay, a Bankable -- door in the house. Inside of it is Tyra Mail! "Tomorrow will make you go gaga. Love, Tyra." Oh, please let it involve Lady Gaga! Please let them all have no pants and bloody eyeballs for all! But alas, there is no such goodness. The girls meet Jay, who tells them that today they're going to do editorial reinterpretations of their own childhood photos. Jay notes that fashion trends tend to repeat themselves, so the Hammer pants (actually, that's technically a Hammer BODYSUIT) that Nicole wore when she was a baby are now known as harem pants and are totally in fashion. In accordance, today they'll revisit the fashion trends of their infancy and make them modern and hip. The photographer for the day is Baldomero Fernandez, who is not quite as swarthy as his name would suggest. The girls get their hair and makeup done, and we catch a glimpse of new makeup artist Erin Ayanian.

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America's Next Top Model




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