America's Next Top Model

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Model Madness!

There is a costume change, and the motion editorial continues. Ann wears a sequined tube dress and whips her hair back and forth, she whips her hair back and forth. Tyra loves how Ann worked her shoulders, and Jay loves the whip-boom-boom-snap of Ann's head. It was a magic moment, he says, Tyra then sits in a chair and shows Chelsey how to flip her head like she's in Flashdance. Jane does the same thing, as do Kayla and Ann. If only a bucket of water were suspended above them and they could truly be maniacs, maniacs on the floor, hair flipping like they've never flipped before. Daylight is running out, so the girls rush to get themselves in menswear and walk down a balcony. Tyra tells us that Jane, who has a stiff walk, has trouble conveying any type of emotion and is hanging on to the handlebars of control. Ann also has a stiff walk, and Tyra tells her to just work the weirdness. That's actually really good advice for Ann. Tyra's direction consists of, "Just weird! Stop! Stop! And turn! And weird! And yes! There ya go!" "Stop, turn and weird" is the new "Stop, drop and roll," but for being on fire metaphorically.

Chelsey is next to walk on the balcony in full Chita Rivera glory. She does a fine job. Once she's finished, the girls get a tight shot with their face covered in netting. They have to whisper their names to the camera, because they've run out of other dumb things to do. Oh wait! No they haven't! The girls rush to some giant nearby bushes, and for a minute it kind of looks like the maze from The Shining. If only, man. Maybe next they'll have to pose with a furry in an assless bear costume. The models are instructed to ask the girl who will theoretically be watching this motion editorial, "What's your beauty?" And then make sweet rotating love to the hedges. Ann gets so into it that she flashes everyone. Kayla does a final spin, and it's a wrap! Tyra rolls around on the ground, because she's insane.

The girls take the bus back to their apartment and talk about how exhausted they are. Ann has no idea if she did well today. She thinks that she did, but others might still think that she's awkward. Chelsey, who has some ill-advised tats, says that she let her personality shine through today, and now is totally freaking out. However, she's feeling pretty confident that she's in the top two. Jane thinks that having some face time with Tyra probably helped her, while Kayla thinks she did a fine job but is freaked out that two girls are going home. Her nerves are wracked, and she doesn't want to go back to the tough neighborhood she comes from, where sleeping bags count as beds. Commercials.

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America's Next Top Model




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