America's Next Top Model
Finale Part II: The Girl or Girl Who Becomes America’s Next Top Model

Episode Report Card
Potes: B- | 33 USERS: C-
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Boring is the New Black

Cory gets up after Jourdan and Marvin stomp off and follows them. And then Laura walks again, followed by Don, Renee, Chris H., who looks like a nutcracker, and Cory again. Then there's more Marvin, who talks about the pride he has in his Latino background. Then there's Jourdan again, in her chain metal cape and headpiece. She handles the outfit with aplomb, and believes that she's going to win the competition. And then we get our final words of wisdom from Danger Love: "For every woman everywhere, there is hope." Not for me, who has recapped eighteen seasons of this shit! Where's my fashion film? Oh God, and then the models all walk down the runway with that stupid "2-0" hand symbol that Tyra keeps trying to make a thing. No wonder Versace fired her at the last minute.

Backstage, Laura high-fives the finalists, and Marvin and Renee get a little smoochy-smoochy time. Johnny tells both Jourdan and Marvin that they blew him away, and he's glad that he doesn't have to be on the panel because he doesn't know what he'd do.

Back at the resort, Marvin sits and thinks and tells us that he's proud of his runway performance and thinks he outshone Jourdan. Jourdan says that the runway gave her a lot of confidence for the final photo. Yes, there is a final photo! And it will be shot by Tyra. They're doing it in front of a banyan tree, and Tyra talks about how she's an ART photographer. An art photographer whose medium is Flixel, and who paints abs on Marvin using bronzer. She also draws XX symbols on them because: Art. Marvin is feeling good about his shoot, but Jourdan thinks that he's having trouble understanding how Tyra wants him to move his body. Jourdan, meanwhile, gets mad wind in the hair, and seems to do a fine job taking direction from Tyra. I think Tyra spends about 90 seconds photographing each of them. It's because she cares! About art.

With that, we're at panel! Marvin ad Jourdan are both in their runway looks, and Tyra -- who is wearing some sort of vintage '30s hair -- tells them how proud she is. In this final week, she says, she and the other judges -- Rob, Kelly and Bryan representing social media -- will look over their entire body of work. There are prizes: a spread in Nylon magazine, a contract with Next Models, and a $100,000 Guess ad campaign. The first piece for evaluation is the first runway pass. Kelly says that she's so proud of Marvin, and remembers the first time she saw him when he was more janitorial than editorial. She thinks that in the runway show he was beautiful and she was in love with him. Rob agrees that Marvin had a presence on the runway, and that the little girls in the crowd were going crazy. Jourdan, meanwhile, was so fierce and beautiful and confident, according to Kelly. She had an Italy walk, and nobody could keep up with her.

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America's Next Top Model

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