America's Next Top Model

Episode Report Card
Potes: B+ | Grade It Now!

Sara is next, with full-on eyebrows in her photo. This is an instance where the Photoshop really would have benefitted her. ALT wishes there was more strength in the photograph. Sara is interesting in front of them, but he doesn't feel the impact of beauty in the photo. Nigel tells Sara that she has a very unique beauty to her, and has to own it and believe in it. Looks like somebody missed an opportunity to work out some real issues with their inner critic. Molly is next. Alek thinks she looks like a warrior, but her neck is squat and should be elongated. Funny, now that no one is saying the words "no-neck monster" I kind of miss them. Nigel says the photo is neither here nor there. It's bland, and not powerful.

Next is Nicole. She says that the bees felt tickly crawling all over her, but then she just thought of them as mosquitos and everything was fine. How...odd. Nigel thinks that Nicole looks older in her picture, but still beautiful. Alek agrees, saying that she's much younger in person than she looks in the photograph. This is the second week in a row that Nicole has looked like the last surviving member of The Golden Girls, and Tyra tells her to soften every bone in her face to look her age in photos. How do you soften your bones? Drink less milk? Nicole looks discouraged. Hannah is up next, and Nigel calls her a poor thing upon seeing her tear-stained face in her photo. Hannah explains that she wasn't crying because of the bees, but rather because she had a wall when she went on set. Nigel says that things happen and you have to go with it. If you're crying and miserable you should emote it, because you give the photographer the opportunity to catch magic. Is Nigel even a photographer anymore? Isn't "judge on America's Next Top Model" pretty much his only resume entry at this point? ALT says that Hannah's neck and hands saved her. The photo is beautiful, and reminds him of a prima ballerina. Tyra also thinks the photo is stunning, because they can feel her insides come to the outside.

Finally, there's Monique. Her eyebrows have been Photoshopped too, and ALT says that she has Shanghai gesture and has hijacked it. I don't know what this means, except for maybe that Monique looks vaguely Asian in her photo. She looks, and I quote, "Like some fabulous woman from the Shanghai, fabulous life of the Shanghai, of the other day, when you were in Shanghai." Got it? Tyra says the photo is strong, and that she looks evil but that's okay. Emoting evil is better than not emoting anything. Alek Wek compares Monique to Shalom Harlow, and makes the sad mistake of mentioning John Galliano in the process. This was filmed months ago, so she didn't know. I'm sure Nigel will mention how he loves the lighthearted fun of Two and a Half Men as well.

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America's Next Top Model




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