American Idol
They're All Wasted!

Episode Report Card
Joe R: C+ | Grade It Now!
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Don't Raise Your Eye

Randy thought the song choice was perfect for her, but he notes how it "got away" from her at the end. Paula says Melissa is coming out of her shell (I'm assuming she means the truck-stop hooker thing) and that she's a "powerhouse." Simon straight-up disagrees with everything that's been said. The crowd has to wait to be told to boo. Fake. Simon says that last note booked Melissa's ticket home. Which is both true and false, and also potentially really false. It's true, because Melissa is totally pegged to go home. It's false, because she would have been going home anyway, blown note or no. But it's maybe possibly really false, because now all of a sudden Melissa is in danger, and maybe that comment right there put whatever fans she has into motion. Smooth move, Simon. It's so juvenile anyway, from him. He says he thinks she "shouted" the last part, which is valid, but then he keeps on smugly repeating that she's going home, she's going home, she's going home. Finally, Seacrest jumps in and allows Melissa to repeat over and over again how she wanted to "leave it on the stage" this week. If by "it" she means excess mousse dripping off her hair, then yes. She totally did.Ryan and Katharine are chatting on the couch in the RC Cola lounge. He asks her about preparation, and she says she tried to choose a song she'd have fun with. Then Ryan takes a minute to throw a bone to the entire internet and asks Kat what's up with all the crazy rumors about how she's quitting the show. She has no idea, and she is emphatic that she is not, in fact, quitting. He also asks about another rumor that I had not heard previously, that Katharine is pregnant. Is this because of the empire waist top? Did Jacob actually start this rumor himself? Perhaps I should be more careful about what I imply Justin Guarini does in his free time. Katharine is sort of wide-eyed and laughing and saying it's all ridiculously false. Ryan, because he's Ryan, wants to make sure nothing untoward has been going on between her and Kevin Covais. Wow, that mental image is just a pile of wrong, isn't it? It even sobers Kat up, to the point where she's like, "Um, no." Then the editing and Ryan are out of sync forever, as they cut to Kevin, who makes a face, but Ryan is still talking to Katharine, so they cut back, but then Ryan realizes Kevin is doing something funny, so he cranes his neck to see, and everything is a step too slow. The bonus of all this is we get to see Ryan and Kat giggling again, which you know I enjoy.

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American Idol

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