American Horror Story
The Dead

Episode Report Card
Mindy Monez: B | 75 USERS: A-
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The Dead

"I'm Just a Girl Who Cain't Say No"!

Zoe approaches Kyle with the gun, intent on killing him. She apologizes for not letting him go when he died, and things get complicated when he appears to recognize what a gun is and is unmistakably terrified. It's harder to kill a person than a zombie. Zoe hesitates, and he grabs the gun from her and turns it on himself. Zoe has a change of heart and stops him from blowing his brains out just in time. The gun goes off and shoots a hole in the glass ceiling (Metaphor! Nope.) of that atrium thing they're in, which just must cost a fortune to have repaired. Zoe assures Kyle that she doesn't want him to die after all.

Queenie and LaLaurie (welcome back, Kathy Bates!) are trying to get their midnight snack on, but Madison had a god-sized hole she had to fill with leftovers earlier, so the fridge is empty. Which can only mean one thing: It's off to the Frostop! I think this is one of our favorite AHS scenes ever, right? Let's not be contrarian about the glory of Gabourey Sidibe and Kathy Bates gal-palling at a three AM drive-thru just for the sake of it. There's a comedy beat where LaLaurie thinks the drive-thru speaker is demon for a moment, but when the voice behind the machine recommends super-sizing her meal it's clear he's speaking her language. Do they dare super-size? Oh yes, yes they do dare. Queenie has a great line about the funny ways life surprises you with a late night burger "with an immortal racist" sometimes, but LaLaurie has a job to do in this scene, and that is to bring Queenie to her storyline's conflict of the week: The other girls in the Coven will never truly accept her because she's black. Umm, what? OK. More on that later.

Hank calls Delia in the middle of the night and she knocks over about 16 things as she reaches for the phone, in case you'd forgotten that she's blind now. She hangs up on him (because he's a cheater, not because he's a MURDERER, which bothers me more and more every week). The camera draws back on his end and we see that he is a little out of it and sitting surrounded by dozens of very large and powerful guns that he has meticulously laid out all over his motel room. "See you soon, baby" he says. I still can't imagine this pissant loser killing anybody significant, but we'll see.

Delia's stumbling around looking for LaLaurie, but she's still off super-sizing and that takes time. Madison spots her at the top of the stairs, but, committed to remaining a secret, quickly hides. But it's all for naught when Delia almost takes a very bad tumble down the stairs and Madison pulls her back, her touch causing Delia to see a vision of Fiona slicing Madison's throat open. "FIONA." It's on!

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American Horror Story

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