Ally McBeal
Buried Pleasures

Episode Report Card
Pamie: D | 6 USERS: A
Buried Pleasures

Get ready for the "most erotic Ally McBeal."

"Fire" is playing in the background as a car drives under a bridge, a skyline is seen, another skyline is seen, and then Ally is fellating her finger. Fish knocks her out of her daze to ask if he's disturbing her. She says no, but her hot-orange-and-white striped shirt under her gray blazer is disturbing me. Ling fingers her coffee cup and gives Ally deep, meaningful, lesbian-foreshadowing stares. Fish and Billy discuss their big case of the episode. "Our client is being sued for sexual harassment," Billy starts. "What did he do, breathe?" asks Fish. "It's a she." She's being sued by the other women in her office for being too sexual. "What?" asks the almost invisible Georgia. Billy prattles on about the woman contributing to a "sexually charged working environment" as Ling continues to stare at Ally until Ally pokes herself in the eye. Everyone is appropriately outraged about the case. Billy gets on his soapbox about how sexual harassment cases exist because women are lesser creatures and need to be protected by the law. Georgia shoots a few poison darts, but she doesn't need any computer generated images. John Cage is holding his cheeks up with his tie. Fish looks around. Ling continues to finger her cup and stare at Ally. Because both of the participants in the case are represented by the firm, Billy has asked Renee to take care of the woman's side in the case. Everyone leaves the meeting.

Ling shuts the door to Ally's office and stares at her. "Ling, what is going on?" Ally asks, while looking like a creamsicle on her way to Take Our Popsicles to Work Day. "Have you ever kissed a woman?" Ling asks. Ally says she's not falling for a trick. Ling says it isn't a trick and asks her again. Ally looks to the right and says, "No." She looks to the right again and says, "I haven't." She looks to the right again and says, "At least not for real." Her head wobbles on her shoulders and I worry about how much weight her tiny frame can hold up. Ling continues to stare. Ally looks to the right, eye rolls and says "Ling! What?" Ling tells Ally she considers her and the "funny little man" to be the resident experts on dreams and she wonders what Ally would tell her if she asked what it meant to dream of kissing another woman. Ally looks to the right for quite a while her mouth pops open and closed like a guppy before she says, "I, I, I don't know." She looks to the right and says, "I wouldn't necessarily make anything of it." She looks to the left and says, "I think it's probably a little normal." She looks to the right. "A little." Her finger floats past her nose.

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Ally McBeal




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